I was Plus Size Bride, and I am ok with that.

In the last year and a half I have been dress shopping  more that I would like to admit. I was the maid of honor in my best friends wedding last fall and as you all know I got marired myself in October. I have learned a little bit in the last year and a half, one of those being I HATE dress shopping. I have had some bad experiences, at certain stores (coughdavidsbridalcough) that make me glad this whole buying a wedding dress thing is all over.

I am a plus size girl, I fall with in size 16-18 depending on the style of the dress. I know that "Bridal" runs small, and I know I was in for a headache before I even started looking for my own wedding dress. I promised some family and my close friends they can go through the whole "looking at me trying on dresses" process, mostly for them, not for me, I hated the whole idea of it. So a month before hand I was at David's Bridal with a friend who was looking for a gown for some benefit, and I figured I would get an idea of some dresses that I wanted so when I went in with the big group of people, I wasn't overwhelmed.

I am not a princess dress person, or a tight dress person, I wanted something tea length-ish. So while my friend was pulling dresses for her benefit I asked one of the girls there what they had for that style. With out even asking me my size, or even measuring me, she simply said "Oh, we don't have many of those in your size, maybe two or three. Our plus section is very small in store." At first I thought her tone was rude, but maybe I was over reacting, but when my friend who was with also heard the sassy/rudeness in her tone. I knew I wasn't over-reacting. So when I went home that night I decided to go on their website, to look at dresses. I wasn't going to have people watch me try on dresses if they only had "two or three for my size." and browsing that website looking at things in my size, was kind of hilarious.

 Because I am a size 16-18 I am right on the edge of regular size and plus size. Some of there dresses go up to 16 or 18 and when others 18 and up are plus size. So I checked both, just in case. I found a dress I loved, it was what I wanted. In standard size it was pretty cheap $200ish. It only went up to a 16. I know bridal runs small so I checked plus size, They had 16 short style dresses compared to the almost 50 of standard size, and most of their short dresses started at 850+, I felt annoyed and discouraged and put off looking at dresses for awhile.

If you follow my YouTube channel, you know I ended up finding my dress, and where I found it was online, Modcloth to be exact. I took my own measurements and decided on a dress I really loved, so I was happy I got to try it on in the comfort of my own home, and with out some sales lady judging me. But my dress shopping wasn't over. I had to go for my friends wedding, which again wasn't a great experience, some dresses we couldn't even look at because they didn't come in that size. In the end I was happy it was over.

I knew going into this it wasn't going to be easy. I know I am a bigger, I know a lot of things wouldn't come in my size. Once I found the dress it was like "phew ok now that is over." but then started the comments, Oh those  "so are you going to lose weight for your wedding? How much weight have you lost to fit into your dress?"comments. Now for some reason a lot of people, and I mean random coworkers, family friends, even random people I barely know online expected me to magically become thinner, or lose weight for my wedding. "you are going to be in pictures! you will look at these forever! Aren't you gonna try to lose weight?" Now don't get me wrong, the 2 months till  wedding I made sure I wasn't eating junk ( i don't eat a lot of junk anyways, but it happens.) so I could make sure I would stay fitting in my dress, but I am fat, there is no other way to say it, I am fat. I was a little smaller than this when I met Eric, I go up and down in my weight all the time but for the most part, I am this size, why would I JUST lose weight to look good in my wedding dress?

Its bad enough trying on dresses at places where they made rude comments at you for being plus size knocks down your self esteem, but once you find that dress that you think you look amazing in, and now people are telling you that you need to lose weight to be thinner so you can look good in photos because its your wedding? So I wont look good because I am fat? No! I am going to be a fat bride, and I have no shame in that. I know I am a bigger girl, it took me a lot of years to love myself, a lot of struggles to love myself, and I am finally here at age 28 and I love myself even though I am fat. Even though that girl at David's Bridal made snotty comments about my size. My now husband loves me, not because of my size. He wont care if I am 20lbs smaller in my wedding dress or this size right now. I am fine with the fact that I am a plus size bride.

At the end of this journey that is what I learned, its been a few months since I started writing this post, my wedding has come on gone. Its been a long journey, and all that is said and done, that day, was amazing. I felt amazing, I took a moment to myself in my best friends bathroom after I was all done up and looked at my self in the mirror, and I saw myself as an adult, I saw a little bit of my grandmother in me (who is a plus size woman) and I saw a beautiful bride. I was overwhelmed by all the compliments that day, I know you get them because you are "the bride" but being told how beautiful you look and stunning, makes you not think about the fact  other people told me i had to look "skinny in your wedding dress." because you don't need to. I had a friend pull me aside that day and tell me as a fellow plus size girl I inspired her, because most people say we "cant wear light colors." and "some dresses are flattering" but I pulled it off and I looked amazing. That right there moved me. And it helped a lot that the one person who mattered  that day, my husband, told me I looked perfect, and amazing all day. And that my friends is what matters. Not the losing weight to look pretty in your dress, or fitting into some plus size bride bubble that stores want you to fit into it. That YOU feel beautiful and amazing and that you are happy. Because its the happiest day of your life, it goes by super quick and you want to enjoy it, not worry if you "look fat" in your wedding dress.

Plus Size OOTD: Princess Leia Star Wars Dress from @HerUniverse

As most of you probably read in my last post, I had a Star Wars themed wedding shower, And of course I had to match my dress to the theme. (I mean what kind of person would I be if I didn't!). And there couldn't be a better dress than this Her Universe Princess Leia dress! 

Now I have been eyeing this dress since last Christmas. It was a bit pricey at my hot topic, and I had no reason to get it. As soon as the girls told me the theme for the shower was Star Wars and I saw the dress was on clearance at Hot Topic AND I had Haute Cash, I took advantage. I am so happy I did, because the dress was PERFECT, and a big hit!

I have said this time and time again, Her Universe is my favorite line for geeky dresses and clothes because they cater to the plus size girls. I have so much from the brand, and this dress fits AMAZING. I was comfy in it all night, and I seriously love it. The dress has the perfect little hint of star wars to it, that unless you KNEW i was wearing a star wars dress, and knew what Leia wore in a New Hope, it just looks like a really fancy white dress. Which I like. I enjoyed that it doesn't scream that its a star wars dress, its still elegant. Perfect for my wedding shower. 

I paired it with white sneakers (because I am me, and I wear sneakers whenever I can.) and a black and white darth vader bow, which I fell like sort of pulled it all together and maybe gave it a little more "oh its star wars!" feel to it. Everyone loved the dress, I got so many compliments, even from people just seeing pictures. Saying how great it looked on me, and what not. I am so glad I waited and got it on sale, and ended up with a dress I love!

Thank you guys for reading! Please follow my blog for more outfits, and other awesome things!

Plus Size Outfit Of The Day - Black Lace Dress

I was on the hunt for a dress for my best friends wedding shower, when I came across this black lace dress at kohls in their plus size department, Let me tell you now I am not really happy with the plus size clothes kohls has, but every so often you find a gem like this one, I wanted a nice dress, but also a dress I can wear again after the wedding shower. It came in many colors so I figured black was the best bet. 

I love how this dress fits, its fancy, but not TOO fancy, and it is my style. I love the lace, its not cheaply made and it fits very comfy. I wanted to keep everything simple so I just paired it with black tights and black flats (all black everything? yeah its very me.) I feel dressed up, but also comfortable enough to dance! Which is very important. And of course my new cat-eye glasses make the cutest little accessory to the outfit. 

I kept my makeup very simple, and soft. Just used my trusty urban decay naked 3 pallet, the benfit blush in "rockatour" and kat von d lipstick in lolita. Kind of the perfect outfit for a wedding shower, but also keeping my own style taste. 

I hope you guys enjoyed my outfit! I am going to be posting more outfits because the next month is very busy, and filled with some cute outfits!

thanks for reading! 

- Ashley 

Plus Size Outfit - Holiday Sweater Edition

Hey everyone! I hope you are having an awesome holiday season! I know its that time of year where everyone gets fancy and goes to parties, and all of that fun stuff, So I wanted to share with you all a few of my holiday outfits. So today's outfit is what I wore to Friendsmas! Which is when  myself and my best friends get together, exchange gifts, hang around and share embarrassing stories, and just have a good time. We try to do this every year. Its not super fancy, its mostly casual, but lets be seriously here, if you need an excuse to get a new outfit, a holiday party is that reason. So my outfit for this party was kind of casual, but all sorts of cute. With the best part of the outfit, the penguin sweater.

Now I found this sweater at a store in my local mall called Payhalf (im not sure if this store is everywhere) they carry a small plus size section and I go in there sometimes to see what they carry. I was shocked to see this cute little sweater with a penguin, wearing a sweater, I couldn't pass it up, I have been collecting all things penguins since I was a kid, and this little guy looked damn cute in his sweater!

I wanted to do something different than sweater and jeans, and I fiddled with a bunch of different ideas, some made me look like a sack of potatoes, and well that happens. Others were just MEH but this one? I felt worked the best. I used my black tripp skirt from Torrid I got a while back, which flowed right. I paired that with my poka-dot tights from torrid, which again I felt pulled everything together. Rather than boots I used my trusty black flats, and boom, outfit is complete!

Outfit Details:

Penguin Sweater - Payhalf (no link sorry guys)
Skirt - Torrid 
Tights - Torrid (no longer online)
Flats - Target (ages ago)


I hope you guys enjoyed this outfit! I love sharing these with you, and I hope you all have a great holiday! Look out for more outfits coming for new years and maybe ill share my Christmas outfit (tho it will include my snowflake sweater ive already shown!)